My daughter and her two children who live with me are away for the long weekend break and the house is so silent and empty without them. My significant other is at the computer playing sudoku all day long and I'm also at my computer trying to learn this and that. So here we are, each in our cocoon, with the CD playing oldies from another era in the background.
I guess this is a form of feeling alone. Last night I was feeling lonely and picked up the phone to call my second daughter who lives and works in the capital city. I got her but it was not convenient to talk as she was attending a wedding dinner. Then I called my younger sister but no one picked up the phone. My spouse was watching telly so I returned to the computer to check email. Then I tried my sister's number again. This time my niece picked up and said that her parents were attending a wedding dinner.
This month is a favourite month for nuptials as it is 09/09 which in Chinese denotes all things auspicious.
Life is a cycle, from birth to childhood, adolescence to adulthood, to parenthood and grandparenthood. Some may not experience all these stages depending on their destiny. One begins as one and inevitably ends up as one again.
In between are the experiences one garners in life, sweet,sour, bitter, bitter-sweet, all part and parcel of what we know as life. Lucky people have beautiful relationships to cherish and lovely memories to dwell upon when one is back to life as one.
But are memories enough? They tend to fade with time and if one is well-off and can afford to live comfortably, life still has its compensations, even if one is alone, the other partner having moved on.
If you are blessed with good health in your old age, it is indeed a wonderful blessing for you needn't be dependent on others for your basic needs. Maybe you can begin another phase of your life, perhaps with another partner, or companion and with sufficient funds to keep you in a lifestyle you can enjoy. This will take away the loneliness.
I guess this is the reason why most men get married again after their wives pass on. Companionship I believe is the main need. Many women on the other hand, choose to live alone and carry on with their lives minus a second husband. Perhaps one in a lifetime is more than enough. Perhaps they have a better focus on the things that mean more to them than a second marriage. I know of a lady who single-handedly brought up her young children after her husband's passing and today they are successful young adults and she is a happy grandmother with the freedom to travel and do what she likes.
However there are some widows who married again and I believe they lead happy lives too.
I guess it all boils down to what you are, what you want to do, what your needs are and what makes you happy. Maybe loneliness is just a state of mind.
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