Although we had a very strict and sheltered upbringing, we also had very happy times when the whole family packed into a Morris Minor and many Sundays were spent at the beach in Morib.
Mum cooked food which we usually ate under the shade of the Casuarina trees after playing in the sea. My father would pack a couple of old tyre tubes which we would use as floats. When the tide was out, we would all dig for clams. That would be our dinner when we got home.
These outings were very exciting for us as Malaya as our country was then known, was fighting the communist insurgency during the Emergency. Father had to apply for a police permit to carry food and we had to wait in a convoy that was escorted by the British soldiers in their armour cars, which had gun turrets. This was to preclude any ambushes by the communists.
I have much to thank my mum for. She taught me how to embroider and later, how to sew. I remember embroidering pillow cases, with pretty daisies and roses. Then I learned to sew simple dresses, and helped her to sew school uniforms for my younger sisters.
Cooking was another skill she imparted to us. Before the Chinese New Year, we would all sit together in the garage, facing the hot charcoal, as we made the Love Letter, Kuih Bangkit and Kuih Baulu, all the traditional cookies. It was like a conveyer belt type of action. She would spoon the batter into the love letter irons and clap them closed. Within a few minutes I had to open the irons and toss out the love letter which my sister would then fold into quarters. She had to be quick or they would not fold once they cool. Then another sibling would put them into the tins. Because we worked together, played together and got punished together, we grew up to be a very close-knit family.
She scrimped and saved so that we could have piano lessons. Every afternoon our piano would be thumping away, as my sister and I took turns to practice. “Practice makes perfect” was drummed into us. It was a good way to de-stress and I usually poured my emotions into the piano pieces. My father’s favourite was the Blue Danube waltz and he would always ask me to play that piece.
He was a very strict no-nonsense disciplinarian with stern notions of how his daughters should dress. We were not allowed to wear shorts and no sam foo ( Chinese apparel consisting of a mandarin collar top and trousers ) outside the house. Sam foos were for housemaids. We could wear the cheongsam ( Chinese dress with high mandarin collar and slits at the sides ). He had no problem with that. He used to bring home treats for us. We had lots of toffee. That probably accounted for our bad teeth!
When we grew into teenagers, I remember my father imposing a ten o’clock curfew when we had class parties at the end of the year. Then during varsity days, the curfew was extended to 11:00 pm. I remember being locked out a few times and my younger sister had to quietly let me in by the side gate, for which she earned a good ticking off.
We have a good laugh when we reminisce those old times but as parents ourselves, we were not harsh in our parenting. It was the carrot more than the stick and our children have turned out well, praise the Lord.
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