Thursday, October 25, 2012

A Change for the Better or Worse?

The world is changing, not just physically in terms of environment and climate but also in mindset and attitudes. Being Asian and a Malaysian, I see the many changes that have come about, many of which are responsible for the social problems facing us today.

There is definitely a generation gap but it depends on which generation we are talking about. My parents’ generation which would be the mid nineteen fifties, would be aghast at the amorality of the majority of the current youth, i.e. the late teens to late twenties. They would have been horrified at the attitude of the now notorious duo who published their sexual acts on the internet, baring all and leaving nothing to the imagination. Had any of their children done this, they would have been disowned publicly for bringing shame and humiliation to their parents. How would they be able to look at friends and relatives in the face if their children had shamed them like this?

Some parents of my generation would still feel this shame and humiliation but will not go to the extent of publicly disowning our offspring. Keeping a stiff upper lip and maintaining the dignity of silence could be one reaction.

However it is interesting to note that many of the duo’s peers have come out to support their infamous deed and are of the opinion that such postings are nothing to fuss over and have accepted it with equanimity. The authorities aren’t leaving it at that. The university at which the young man is enrolled is considering measures for his breaching the code of conduct and his scholarship is in danger of being revoked. The Malaysian authorities are looking into whether the couple have broken the law by posting what is considered obscene material online.

The girl’s widowed mother is demanding that the duo marry but the boy’s family supports his view that marriage is not on the cards for now. He, despite his earlier bravado that he is unaffected by what people think of his actions, is, in my opinion, now capitulating to public outrage and has said that he will apologise to the university to keep his scholarship and to avoid expulsion. He is a final year student reading Law under a prestigious scholarship. At the moment he is on leave from the university and his scholarship funds have been suspended. To a certain extent he is being “forced” to conform by his intended action as he feels that he will receive a harsher punishment if he continues to show that he is unrepentant.

A good many people feel that this couple should have kept their sexual acts private and not for public viewing. So far it seems that many young women today think nothing of sending their naked photos to their boyfriends through their smart phones, whether out of narcissism or encouragement by their partners. Some however have regretted it when their erstwhile boyfriends chose to upload them onto the net either upon a falling out or for blackmail purposes. The newspapers have published a number of such cases.

Some parents have a different take on this. An indignant father said that he would castrate the young man. There are also parents who have been very liberal with their offspring, leaving them without “moral” anchors. It could be just a phase which the young will grow out of. Some have said that the young should be taught “no sex until after marriage”. Is this really possible given the current moral climate of permissiveness?

There is also the “do it but don’t get caught”, meaning don’t get pregnant. However, the young are still ignorant of how to avoid pregnancies and when the unwanted babies come, they are simply dumped or killed as a solution by the young mother who is often left in the lurch by the father of the baby.

Parenting is a great challenge today. It is no wonder that many married couples prefer to remain childless. Would you bring a child into the world as it is today?
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